In one moment I was back to sanity. It was that fast. What a miracle! I was so far gone but one moment of clarity brought me back from the abyss.

I had bought the story I was telling myself lock, stock and barrel. There was no way of convincing me otherwise. Again, it was another “poor me” story.

This time the storyline was: I wasn’t a priority. I know deep in my heart that that is not the truth, but nothing would convince me of that when I was down in the muck and mire. I kept finding evidence to support my theory. I was right!

Now as I look back I see how silly I was. Does it feel good to be right? From the ego’s perspective, yes, it does and that is how you get hooked in. Hook, line and sinker I fell for the ego’s trick once again.

In hindsight I am happy to be wrong. I want to realize that I made a mistake. I was baiting my friend. I wanted to see what the answer would be. At the time I could not see that. I would not admit that. Now after enough time has passed I can see exactly what I did.

The most important thing to take away is that I do not want to do it again. I do not want to attempt to make anyone suffer, least of all a dear friend.

Here is another touch point for me. I took my friend to a place she did not want to go and I know better now.

In the words of Maya Angelou, “when you know better you do better!”